Our besetting sin?

"Leaving behind the sin that so easily besets us" (Hebrews 12:1)

Do you have a sin that so easily besets you? A sin that you fall into time and time again? Is it time to lay down that weight and hindrance in your walk with God?

King David had such a besetting sin. That sin was lust. In 2nd Samuel 11 and 12, we are told about an incident in David's life when he caved in to the sin of lust. It is the story of David's adultery with Bathsheba, and the sins committed in attempting to cover it up, deception, betrayal, murder.

Many of us have a problem with lust. Here are some startling statistics about pornography:

• 25% of search engine requests are related to sex
• 35% of downloads from the internet are pornographic
• 40 million Americans say they regularly visit porn sites
• 70% of men aged 18 to 24 visit a porn site at least once per month
• The largest consumer group of online porn is men between the ages of 35 and 49
• One-third of all internet porn users are women
• Sunday is the most popular day of the week for viewing porn (https://www.therecoveryvillage.com/process-addiction/porn-addiction/related/pornography-statistics/#gref)
• 55% of married men say they watch porn at least once a month, compared to 70% of not married men. 
• The following percentages of men say they view pornography at least several times a week:
• 18-30-year-olds, 63%
• 31-49-year-olds, 38%
• 50-68-year-olds, 25% (http://www.provenmen.org/2014pornsurvey/)

David's incident with Bathsheba was not isolated. It was the culmination of years of sexual self-gratification. David's first wife was Michal. Then he married Abigail, then Ahinoam. Then followed Maacah, Haggith, Abital, Eglah (2 Samuel 3:2-5). This was while David still lived in Hebron, during his first seven and a half years as king over Judah (2 Samuel 2:11). He took even more women as wives and concubines when he reigned from Jerusalem (2 Samuel 5:13). David was never satisfied sexually. David had a problem with lust.

Gods intention for us is that a man would have only one wife, to whom we would cleave and have a faithful close relationship, until death do us part (Genesis 2:24, Malachi 2:14-16, Matthew 19:5, Ephesians 5:31-33, 1 Timothy 3:2, 12, 1 Timothy 5:9, Titus 1:6).  When we disregard this, like David did, it has repercussions.  

This is why it is so important that we confess our sin, and repent to God for having broken God's marriage laws, and damaged our relationships till it has become the norm to divorce and remarry.  This is not God's way. His way is the way of repentance and reconciliation, not abandonment.

"Lord, please forgive us for being unfaithful to the wife of our youth, and for having indulged in sexual addiction.  Please forgive us and cleanse our minds and hearts. In Jesus name. Amen."

Worship With Us! - May 3, 2020

Good morning everyone!  The weather is great, and we have a chance to worship together, on our laptop, phone, tablet or TV!

Join with us as we worship the God who is totally in control of this planet,  including out of control viruses!

Let it Rain - Michael W Smith - 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ccoIvchSJB0

Do it Again - Elevation - 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0B_lnQIITxU

What a Beautiful Name/Break Every Chain - Hillsong Worship - 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eai9Tcmx1TQ

MESSAGE

Title:          Dealing with my anger
Scripture: Ephesians 4:26
Date:          May 3, 2020

INTRODUCTION

• "A father of three won a shouting contest with a roar louder than a passing train. "If you want a war, you go!" Yoshihiko Kato shouted. The sound meter registered 115.8 decibels, louder than the racket of a train passing overhead on an elevated railroad. For that winning shout, Kato won the $750 grand prize of the 10th annual Halls Year-End Loud Voice Contest. Kato admitted that he probably built up his loud voice shouting at his children."  (Resource, Jan/Feb 1991)
• How many of us can echo this story?  
• How many of us have a problem with anger?
• Statistics don't lie.  "Asked about their feelings the previous day, the majority of Americans (55%) in 2018 said they had experienced stress during a lot of the day, nearly half (45%) said they felt worried a lot and more than one in five (22%) said they felt anger a lot." (https://news.gallup.com/poll/249098/americans-stress-worry-anger-intensified-2018.aspx
• These statistics indicate anger is a stated problem to over one in five Americans. Let  alone those who were not willing to admit to the issue.  Another statistic says that around one in three people knows someone who has an anger problem 
• This morning we are going to examine the problem of anger 

WHAT IS ANGER?

• Anger is a normal and natural emotion which can be triggered in different ways.
• "Common roots of anger include fear, pain and frustration.  For example, some people become angry as a fearful reaction to uncertainty, to fear of losing a job, or to fear of failure. Others become angry when they are hurt in relationships or are caused pain by close friends"(http://www.markmerrill.com/3-ways-to-get-to-the-root-of-anger 
• Anger itself is not a sin. It is how we express that emotion that could be sinful.
• "Be ye angry and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil." (Ephesians 4:26)
• We can choose to ignore the emotion anger.  But if we do this, it stays there, pent up inside.  
• "Whenever we ignore or bury an emotion, it is buried alive. At some time and in some way, that ignored or buried emotion will express itself – physically, psychologically, or spiritually.” (http://www.markmerrill.com/3-ways-to-get-to-the-root-of-anger/)
• Situations continue, more anger is triggered, till the pent up emotion explodes like a volcano, hurting ourselves and the people around us.  That is not God's way to deal with anger. God is a God of love, uncontrolled anger is selfish.

SO HOW CAN WE DEAL WITH ANGER?

• Reacting angrily results in hurt feelings, pain and damaged relationships. 
• This is not the way God would have us respond to others
• God's way will be one that is based in love for the other person. 
• The initial emotion of anger, however, is usually a defense against 1) the object of our fear, 2) the source of our pain, or 3) the reason for our frustration. It is not motivated by love for the other.
• So how can we deal with these triggers?
• 1. Replace fear with love
• "Perfect love casts out fear" (1 John 4:18)
• When we are afraid of someone, our thoughts are centered on ourselves and how we feel. Fear is selfish. We may think the fear is justified, but ultimately it is all about me.
• God's love on the other hand is outgoing, totally selfless. 
• John here tells us if we truly love the other person we will not be afraid of them. "He that fears is not made perfect in love"(1 John 4:18)
• So, learn to love the other. See them the way God sees them. See them as a brother, not an adversary.
• 2. Forgive and let go of the source of our pain
• There is so much hurt and pain. 
• Many of us experienced the pain of abuse while growing up. 
• This pain led to us building walls to prevent that pain happening again.  Our anger is a way we protect ourselves.
• But ultimately, that anger hurts us more than the other person. It robs us of inner peace, it robs us of relationships that could have been, and it robs us of our health.
• Gods way for us to deal with the pain, is to forgive the one who hurt us, and then let that debt go. (Matthew 6:12, 5:43-45, 18:21-35)
• This then enables us to move on with our life. We no longer need to be angry at that person.
• 3. Recognize others are answerable to God, not us.
• Frustration with others usually comes from us expecting them to see things the same way we do.
• This however is unreasonable. 
• Each person has their own family background,  their own set of experiences, which created their own perspectives and frame of thinking.
• We can't expect them to see everything the way we do.
• Ultimately, they are answerable to God, not us.
• "Who are you that judges another man's servant? to his own master he stands or falls." (Roman's 14:4)

HOW CAN I MANAGE ANGER?

• "Abraham Lincoln's secretary of war,  Edwin Stanton, was angered by an army officer who accused him of favoritism.  Stanton complained to Lincoln, who suggested that Stanton write the officer a sharp letter.  Stanton did so, and showed the strongly worded missive to the president.  "What are you going to do with it?" Lincoln inquired.  Surprised, Stanton replied, "Send it." Lincoln shook his head. "You dont want to send that letter," he said. "Put it in the stove. That's what I do when I have written a letter while I am angry. It's a good letter and you had a good time writing it and feel better. Now burn it, sand write another." (Today in the Word, February 1991, p. 9.)
• Another way you can manage anger is to delay your reaction. You can do this by taking a walk, do some gardening, watch a movie. Just dont respond in the heat of the moment.
• Another way is to sit down and list the other person's good qualities and actions, so you see them in perspective
• Finally, think about long term consequences.  Do you really want to risk destroying a relationship? 

CONCLUSION

• Each of us is able to control our anger
• We are able to manage our tongue and respond to other people around us with love and consideration. 
• We are able to deal with people Gods way. 
• We may feel this is asking too much. 
• God says "The things which are impossible with men are possible with God" (Luke 18:27)
• You can do this! Be encouraged!

PRAYER

• "Lord, please help me as I face my anger and learn to react to it in the way you would. Thank you that all things are possible with you. In Jesus name, amen."